They (whoever they are) say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and another branch of ‘they’, say that beauty is only skin deep. Which bunch of ‘they’ do we believe? Are they both right?
As humans, we just can’t help challenging other people’s perceptions of beauty. We get an idea in our head of what beauty is mainly from the mainstream media and yes, our parents, and if someone doesn’t conform we dismiss them and their choices.
Burden of shadeism
Black people especially are confused about what is beautiful as we also suffer under the yoke of shadeism with many believing that the lighter you are the more beautiful you are. It’s not true of course but when images of so-called celebs are airbrushed to make them look lighter it does make you think.

If your best friend started dating a dark chocolate brother/sister with a flat nose and large jawbone, would you challenge their choice? Or are you one of those people who can look beyond the superficial to the beauty beneath the skin?
Brainwashed
In this video clip actor, Dustin Hoffman talks about how he came to have an epiphany whilst preparing for the role of Tootsie (FYI it’s a good film if you’ve never seen it go hire it). To play Dorothy, Hoffman underwent makeup tests to see if he could look like a woman. The actor was shocked that he wasn’t more attractive as a woman and asked the make-up people to make him look like a beautiful woman. When told it wasn’t possible and that was as good as it got, he went home and cried.
He realised that he had dismissed women who didn’t physically meet the demands of the standard of beauty he’d been brainwashed into thinking was the norm. Even as he describes his experience in this video he tears up.
Your idea of beauty
So yes beauty is in the eye of the beholder but are you beholding YOUR idea of beauty or society’s idea of beauty? Do you ever stop and think about the opportunities you have missed because you didn’t stop to talk to that very dark/light, flat nosed/strait nosed, nappy headed/dreadlocked woman/man?

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